After the first song it can be a nice way to gently ease your guests into the nights dancing by having couples slow dancing whether that be through Bobby Darins` “Beyond the Sea” or a Sinatra or Michael Buble number.

Older guests in particular can often prefer to waltz with their partners. For some of your guests dancing with their partner or dancing with a relative or friend during a slow set  might be the only time that they will be on the dance floor – if they can be accomodated it can demonstrate your thoughtfulness for your guests preferences. This can also be facilitated by the couple asking relatives if they have any special requests or songs of significance to their county.
All of this can be discussed in our informal meeting prior to the day.  For other people having a slow set with songs from the 80s/90s or current songs might be more their thing. For some people a slow set means playing an Aretha Franklin or Dusty Springfield or Otis Redding song – Aretha`s ‘I say a little prayer for you’ and Dusty`s ‘Son of a Preacher Man’ come to mind here.

From my own experience, on the wedding night itself guests will sometimes request a slow set – unless the couple have said otherwise I would accommodate this on the night. A couple may have given me a few slow songs in their list of songs but not asked specifically for a slow set and I would normally consider these songs in this scenario. When it comes to selecting possible slow songs some people’s perfect slow number can be another persons cheese so it’s important to have this established beforehand.  As with everything in life there are no absolutes when it comes to music selections for slow sets. (Some couples prefer not to have any slow songs as they want the energy and tempo of the music to be high at all times with even their first song being fast paced. This also works and keeps the energy on a high in the room. – for more on this see my blog on ‘Choosing the First Dance’)

If I am playing after a band and the band have played a slow set, then I usually  wouldn’t also play a slow set unless specifically requested, although on occasion I would play a few slow songs during the bands break if they took one. This can really work well particularly if the songs you want to hear are not part of the bands repetoire. It would be good to say this to the band prior to the day. They may well want to continue on or start the second half of their set with a slow song.

In the end the decision on whether or not to have a slow set  comes down to personal preference and the demographics of the wedding party.  It can be a great way of keeping older guests included in the festivities and it might well be one of the few times during the course of the day that you get some quality alone time together. Of course if the idea of a ‘slow set’ sets your teeth on edge you don’t have to go there!
Let the choice be yours.

I have been a DJ for over twenty years;  I’ve had club residencies, played hundreds of corporate gigs  and weddings and performed in venues across Europe and in the US. This particular blog will focus on weddings and the growing trend of band/dj packages. This is understandable as it seems easier to organise and can save precious time for couples, particularly if you are trying to organise an Irish wedding and are not currently living in Ireland. The package can also seem like better value – an important consideration in these straitened times, however before taking this option there are a few issues couples should consider.

Some bands quote an all inclusive price with the dj element of the package represented as considerably reduced or even “free”, however in many cases the all inclusive price is not significantly cheaper than booking a band and dj separately. You are the customer and you should be able to get separate quotes for the band and dj so you can compare with other acts accordingly. Additionally you should not feel under pressure to book the two together because the band insists on ‘their’ DJ – usually a member of the band or perhaps their sound engineer or roadie.  While the argument is sometimes made that an inclusive band/dj package makes for a smoother transition between the different elements of the night’s entertainment, this is not a serious consideration as a professional DJ will always set up at the same time as the band  to ensure there is seamless continuity on the night.

The big question here, however, is can the bass player or sound engineer or roadie be trusted to do a good job as a dj for your wedding? I myself am a professional DJ and have devoted a lot of time to perfecting my craft. While I was a musician in an earlier life, I would not work professionally as a musician at a wedding.  Conversely, while musicians or sound engineers might have some have transferable skills in terms of Djing, would you take the chance on your wedding day? In a way it would be like getting your cake maker to do the main course for your meal!  With this point in mind if you are considering the option of going with a band/DJ package make sure to go and listen to the DJ as well as the band before booking.

In my experience as a wedding DJ, I usually play for longer than the band.  As the DJ normally provides the bulk of the night’s entertainment its extremely important that you choose a professional whether as part of an inclusive package or not and if the band insists upon a particular DJ– unless you are totally satisfied they are up to the job – don’t be afraid to call the band’s bluff. You only have one ‘big day’ after all and you want to remember a packed dance floor with all your loved ones having the night of their lives!

I know it can sound obvious but being really prepared is a good place to start from. This always involves meeting up with the couple to establish musical likes and dislikes and to identify the mood which couples wish to create on the night.  Meeting up is also a good way to get some background information on the demographics and broad musical tastes of the wedding  party.
Sometimes couples might like to incorporate a guest’s talents into the musical choices – there might be an uncle who does a mean Elvis dance or a friend who was part of the Riverdance troupe in a former life.  From my own experience it is great if I know this in advance of the day so I can be prepared.

After a full three course meal and speeches it can be helpful to start gently from the meal and speeches into the dancing phase of the evening by gently warming up your guests with some easy listening numbers before the actual first dance. (I have written a blog about the first dance see this for more regarding this) This helps in setting the tone for the next part of the night.
Not all wedding parties need ‘warming up’ of course -  on occasion I have had the dance floor almost full with people in such good party form that they cannot hold themselves back from the first song that I play. A good dj will be an expert in guaging the mood of the crowd and act accordingly – part of the preparation involves having a few different options ready to suit the guests on the night.

On the night itself an excellent dj is relaxed and comfortable behind the decks and is always keeping an eye on the dance floor. I enjoy what I am doing and I engage with the people on the floor. By doing this I get a sense of what people want to hear. A good dj is never merely going through the motions, but  is constantly tuned into the reactions of the guests, ensuring that the energy remains high and the dancefloor full! I find its important to keep the different rhythms of music moving on the night. What I mean by this is not sticking with one genre for too long.
For example 80s music can be good as people in their late twenties and early thirties like the sound and it also helps that it is going through a revival at the moment. For people in their forties, fifties and even sixties it was the pop music for them in their day and it brings that nostalgia bonus to the dance floor as well. Having said all this if I was to play 80s all night it would become monotonous – its important to add some variety to the mix. ( On this point there are some couples who choose a musical theme for the night’s entertainment and this can work well with particular wedding parties – I will speak about this in a future blog.)

Having a list of songs of likes and dislikes from meeting up provides a good starting point and a handy point of reference to dip into as the dancing progresses, to blend with the dj’s own choices on the night. I also always throw in a few pleasant surprises based on my meetings with couples.  A good dj will ensure that the music on the night is tailored to the the couples own musical tastes and will work with couples to tease out their preferences. From my own experience, its important that a wedding dj has a sufficiently wide repetoire to cater to all musical tastes and has the necessary experience to adapt quickly to the mood of the wedding party on the night.
For instance, if for some reason a couples music choices are not working, I always have a plan B at the ready; with over twenty years of experience and an ear for a good tune I know how to keep your guests busy on the floor and having a great time on your day of days.  Now whats the next song…

Most couples have already seen me play (either at a wedding or in the Sugar Club where I have had a weekly residency since 1999) or they have received a recommendation from a friend, so they know I always deliver when it comes to keeping the dance floor full and that they are in capable hands. Listen to some mixes I provided for the club.   The high numbers of recommendations I receive reflects not just my skill as a dj but also the high level of professionalism and reliability I bring. I take the time to tailor every set to the specific requirements of each couple, and will always meet up to go through like, dislikes and special requests in advance of the big day. I am conscious that each wedding is unique and is a once in a lifetime event and I strive to ensure that each couple and their guests has a night to remember!

Over the course of the last 13 years or so I have played after many bands at wedding and corporate gigs. One band that  has stood out is The Camembert Quartet who now also go under the moniker of The Late Late Show House band. At the turn of the century I was settling into my regular slot at the Sugar Club in Dublin and I heard Oisin the manager of the club raving about this band he saw playing at  Vicar Street.  He was delighted with himself as they were going to play monthly at the Sugar club. Since then they have had a strong association with the club becoming synonymous with the venue. Paddy (aka Clint Velour) the lead Singer has lots of charisma and really knows how to engage an audience, with lots of interaction and even on occasion getting members of the audience involved on stage.

Apart from the Sugar Club I have seen them play in a variety of settings from intimate venues to grand size halls such as the RDS and they never fails to ensure the guests/audience dance the night away and have lots of fun as well.   As Paddy says himself they are the ‘greatest five piece quartet ever’. They can change the genre of a song and make it their own.   An example that comes to mind is the 80s classic Lionel Ritchies “All Night Long” a great song that they sometimes choose to end their set.   The band infuses the song with a latin flavour, with Doc doing his magic on the  keys and the rhythm section of Cormac on Bass and Ray on drums quickening the tempo of the song to create a real carnival atmosphere.  The band are very adaptable to the mood of the crowd and can slow it right down or rock out with a mash up of Daniel O donnell doing  ” A Whole Lotta Rosie”, one of their more innovative offerings!   They are also adept at switching into whatever is currently floating people’s boat.  For instance at Brian O Driscoll and Amy Hubermanns wedding the band starting off acoustically with Candi Staton`s original version of  “You Got The Love” and proceeded to build up into the anthemic version associated with Florence and the Machine, the band at full tilt driving it on to a climatic ending.  I could say more about them but I reckon the best thing to do is to check them out for yourself.  By the end of the night you will be saying to yourself and your friends ‘Yeah you know what, maybe they are the greatest five piece quartet I have ever seen’.

Visit www.camembertquartet.ie

If you are really not happy about being the focus of attention you can always skip the ‘first dance’ or alternatively get your guests to join in from the start or half way through the song (you can plan this in advance or wait and see how it goes!). The song doesn’t have to be a slow one either. I have played mid paced and fast paced songs where couples have got their guests to join in from the start. This really helps in getting the party atmosphere going and takes the focus of attention away from the couple if that’s what they want.

On a final note while I have dealt with lots of couples who have expressed concern about the first dance, on the night these concerns all vanish and the couple are very much in the moment. Surrounded by your family and friends the first dance will be one of your most treasured memories of your day.